The word can have swearing but not genderisation which might be offensive (mother) nor allusions to sexual dominance (motherfucker). Nor, other possibly offensive connotations. It seems that the word is commonplace and people won’t stop using it, so an alternative to the word may be useful. But the problem with alternatives, is that people might not use them unless they carry a meaning that’s attention grabbing in some way, and when it comes to this word it needs to be able to be used in either a serious (non-funny) or comedic way.
Upvoting because this is a a true “no stupid questions” post.
So… I think you need to look into the social and cognitive nature of swear words. Vsauce has a pretty good primer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dd7dQh8u4Hc
I think you also need to let go of the desire to be better than common culture, and/or the desire to engineer a better culture from an external perspective. People are gross and messy, imprecise and reckless. It’s what makes us interesting, motherfucker.
Are you looking for an inoffensive insult?
…or for an insult so accurately aiming at the person to be insulted like pissing through a key hole from a 11.5 ft distance.
Motherfucker, what the motherfucking fuck are you fucking on about?
Are you some kind of fatherfucker with this fatherfucking fuckery?
‘You fucking donkey’ is a personal favorite
Speciesist connotations
Lol the downvotes here! Some people in the comments really didn’t like this.
You want an alternative to “motherfucker” that can’t be offensive in any way?
Yeah no. Do you even realize what you are asking?
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You’re such a wank-clown. (Among the least common combos.)
Stop insulting him you scum-wit
Now you’ve gone and done it, you dumb goblin.
Stop it you butt bag!
- Piece of Shit
- Scumbag
- Douchebag
- Dickhead
“Dad”
Literally means the same thing.
That’s offensive to lesbian couples who used artificial insemination only.
“Asshole” is a personal favorite.
Maternal fornicator
I’m good with sticking with plain old motherfucker and have absolutely zero intention of replacing it with some convoluted bullshit alternative. I figure if he/she/it/they/them are offended by my use of the word motherfucker then it’s aimed at he/she/it/they/them anyway and all those motherfuckers can get fucked and stay fucked. Tired of catering to everyone’s sensibilities. Grow a pair, or a twat, put on your grown up panties and get the fuck over it.
How about DGR Dave’s “son of a butt”?
do- do you realize what you’re asking? this is the firstest of world problems.
Mother/father is inclusive and a drop-in replacement at least syllable-wise.
I say “muffuletta”, which is a type of sandwich.
Problematic with the use of meat & cheese in the traditional recipe
“Motherfather” could accidentally be interpreted as a transphobic insult, possibly.
Asshole works, but its not as rude.
The bigger question is, are you honestly that much of a prude?
I actually think that depending on the context asshole is more hurtful than motherfucker. “He’s a stupid motherfucker” seems like you are just angry. “He’s an asshole” sounds like he legit is a ln awful person. Not a dominant fucker or anything. Just a dirty, unpleasant being. It is more demeaning I would say. I would be more hurt to be called an asshole than a motherfucker.
