• VirtualOdour@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    8 months ago

    So I go out with a rich friend and they want to stop and get a drink in a bar they like the look of, they buy us each a pint and it costs $14. Later I have to send them seven dollars which means I have to cut down on my food shopping and worry about spending, maybe I have to cancel going out with another friend.

    They don’t care about this and nor do you, the only thing that matters is the rich person might feel anxious about their social status? That’s total bullshit, don’t you think I’d feel shitty sitting there not drinking with them or ruining their evening by declining the suggestion to stop for a drink like I would alone? When do my social fears matter in this equation? Oh of course, never because it was written by some affluent fuckwit trying to justify the fact all their old friends find them insufferable.

    ‘They don’t care about the 4 dollars’ quote actually translates to ‘they don’t care about you as a person or any difficulties you might go through in a practical sense because a lingering self-doubt that everyone has regardless of the situation trumps all’

    Everyone worries that their friends don’t really like them, it’s part of being human. Pushing that onto your friend as a practical problem when they already have the many emotional, psychological, and practical worries associated with the situation is a selfish dick move.

    • EatATaco@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      8 months ago

      You’ve learned that it’s a cry for help. What you choose to do with it is up to you.

      But I was responding to someone claiming this was just shitty behavior, and suggesting it makes them a bad person. I was addressing this. It’s quite presumptuous to turn that into me not caring about what happened in some hypothetical situation that you just posed to me right now.

      • VirtualOdour@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        8 months ago

        But the point we’re making is it’s not a cry for help it’s pushing their emotional problems on someone else in a physical form while refusing to take on board other people’s emotional problems caused by their poorer economic position.

        ‘Beating my wife is actualy a cry for help, pity me!’ No you’re an awful person objectively in the wrong.

        Just writing an article about how hard done by you are doesn’t change the reality you’re in the better position in every regard and pushing your issues onto your friends is not the action of an actual friend. Suck it up or use money on therapy.